First Date and then some
by ncistennis
Summary: Kensi and Deeks finally go on their first official date together. I've decided to write past the first date, so it will continue with their relationship. References to my story Deeks is a Sweetie. Formerly known as First Date.
1. Chapter 1

Hey everyone! So this is a continuation of Deeks is a Sweetie. I'm not sure how long I am going to have it be. So everyone please read and review, especially review!

I don't own anything, other than my school books.

Kensi was on Cloud 9 as she got ready for her first officially date with her partner Marty Deeks. No one from the team knew that they were going out on a date. Yes, Deeks had asked her and she had said yes but everyone thought Kensi was high off ibuprofen and that it was just a joke. Callen and Sam knew that Kensi and Deeks both liked each other, Deeks drooled and Kensi gawked. It seemed like they were the only two that didn't think they were right for each other. Granted they both were stubborn, but still it seemed like they had chemistry from day one. They both teased each other profusely, yes, that was part of their nature, a defense mechanism to protect themselves from getting too involved and getting hurt. It was funny to watch them bicker, especially when people asked them if they were together or when they had to go undercover as lovers, or a married couple. It always seemed like they protested just a tad too much. Deep down Kensi knew she liked Deeks, hell she thought it was love at first sight. Deeks on the other hand, he liked Kensi just as much as she liked him. He was sort of scared of her, she was a Hetty in training and that scared him shitless. But now, they were finally having a proper first date together, without being undercover.

Kensi danced around her room getting dressed, it was so had not to have a smile on her face in work today, and every time she looked at Deeks or Deeks looked at her, her heart skipped a beat. Yes, Kensi Blye was in fact in love. Kensi was just putting her make up on when the doorbell rang, 'crap' she thought ' I guess I took too much time doing my hair' she thought. She texted Deeks that the door was open and to come in that she would be down shortly, she didn't want him to see anything before she was completely made up and dressed.

{Deeks, doors open just come walk in. I will be down in 5 maybe 10}

{Got that princess, sorry I'm early}

{No worries}

She heard Deeks open her front door and come in

"Hey Kens" he called

"Hey Deeks" she called back

"I'm almost done" Kensi added

"Need any help"

"No I'm good" she said

Kensi was putting on her jewelry now. She was wearing a navy one shoulder dress, it came to 4 inches above her knee and was skin tight. She knew she looked good. She slid on her hot pink shoes for a pop of color and grabbed her pink clutch. 'Nahh, I don't need a jacket' she thought to herself

"Ok Deeks, I'm coming down now" Kensi said

Deeks was still sitting on her sofa in the living room, he could hear her footsteps above him, now he could see those bright pink shoes descending the stairs. At that moment Deeks stood up to give her a hug and when Deeks looked at her, he was speechless. Now that was an uncommon thing for Marty Deeks.

"Kens!" Deeks exclaimed

"You look, you're like, you look amazing. Even more beautiful than at work, which I didn't think was possible"

"Mary Deeks speechless, I'll be damned" Kensi said laughing. She went over and gave Deeks a kiss on the cheek and a hug.

"Kensi you look absolutely gorgeous" Deeks stood their drooling and gawking. He was amazed that someone could look so incredibly gorgeous.

"Thanks, you look pretty good yourself" Kensi said. She could not get over how incredible her partner looked. His tanned skin against his oceanic blue eyes. Oh his eyes were amazing; she could look into them all night long. His blonde hair looked just right, and he smelled so good. A mix between axe and salt water. She could stand there and stare at him all night long.

For the first time in their partnership they both felt awkward.

"Kens, your dress looks amazing on you" Deeks stood in front of her admiring her navy dress, and her pink accessories, oh and the way her diamond earrings and necklace looked on her tanned skin. Deeks thought he died and went to Heaven.

"Thanks, I'm liking your shirt" Kensi felt her face flush when she said that. She also stood there looking at his dark wash jeans, his green dress shirt and sport coat.

"Thank you" he said blushing a little too.

"So, Miss Blye, are you ready to go?" Deeks asked

"Yup, are you" Kensi asked

"Deeks, you're staring. Do I have something on my face; did I drop the mascara wand on my face or something?"

"What, no sorry. You look beautiful" Deeks looked at her face, she didn't have a lot of makeup on, she didn't need it. Deeks couldn't get over how good she looked, granted he's used to seeing her in jeans, tight shirts and boots usually with black latex gloves on pointing a gun at some goon but tonight was different than work. Tonight was going to be their night.

"Shall we go?" Deeks asked

"Sounds good" Kensi said. Deeks help out his arm like a gentleman and Kensi took it. For once she would let him drive.

As they both got in the caddy Deeks asked her "You ready"

"Deeks, you don't need to keep asking me that" Kensi said giving him a kiss on the cheek.

"Just making sure" Deeks said, flashing her one of his winning smiles.

"So where are we going?" Kensi asked

"It's a secret; I think you will like it. One of my buddies from LAPD told me about it a while who, the food is amazing" Deeks said

"I can't wait" Kensi said, flashing her winning smile. As they drove off into the sunset, they were both grinning from ear to ear.

So I sort of based this story off my best guy friend and I; how he was speechless when he saw me and we weren't even going on a date. I also went with my love for Deeks so I hope you all enjoy!

please review! I will update soon! Review!


	2. Chapter 2

Hi everyone! I hope you continue to read and review. I want to thank those of you that do read and review. Thanks you! I don't know what Kensi's favorite flowers are so I just picked these because there pretty.

On the way to the restaurant Deeks remembered he forgot to give Kensi the flowers he bought for her. They were her favorite kind Gerber Daises. Deeks wasn't sure how he knew this, but he was certain. Maybe from an op? Who knows he thought.

Deeks had their whole night planned out. They would go to the new restaurant that was sort of on the beach. The sunset from the deck of the restaurant called The Sun was beautiful. They picked a good name. Then after dinner Deeks thought they would bring a blanket and they could lie on the beach or take a walk. These were just his ideas; he didn't want to set anything uncase Kensi didn't like his ideas. He had butterflies in his stomach and he wasn't sure why, why was he nervous to go on a date with his partner who he has had a crush on for a really long time? He realized Kensi seemed nervous too. You don't see her nervous often, she had been on a few ops but she was always so confident when she was under cover trying to seduce whatever suspect she had to.

Kensi too was lost in her own thoughts. She couldn't believe the day she had been waiting for forever was finally going to happen. She felt like a young school girl who was talking to her crush for the first time. I've been on plenty of dates before, why am I nervous all of a sudden. Kensi knew she hardly ever got nervous, but tonight she had butterflies, and they were big butterflies. She looked over at Deeks, who she thought, looked a little nervous too. Why were they nervous to be around each other? They had been on plenty of ops, they had to be undercover as lovers, they have talked about everything; yet here they were out on their first date nervous. She hoped she would say anything stupid like she had earlier, 'I like your shirt'. She thought of her earlier statement and cringed. Kensi didn't want to keep thinking about her earlier comment, so she figured they could start to talk.

"It's so nice out tonight" Kensi said pointing to the sky where it was a pretty shade of orange and purple.

"It really is, I love taking Monty to the beach on nights like these and just letting him run around while I lay there. You will have to join us now" Deeks said smiling

"Are you asking me out on a second date, before we even arrive at our first date?" Kensi asked with the same grin evident on her face.

"Possibly, why not" Deeks said, getting a little nervous that Kensi was going to tease him and say no.

"Well, you're in luck, because I say yes to a second date, and a thousand more dates.

"Good, and you're in luck because I'm going to ask you out on a thousand more dates" Deeks said

"Good" Kensi said giving him a kiss on the cheek. She really hoped they were going to kiss more passionately, she was getting tired of the middle school kisses.

"So were almost here, I think you will like it" Deeks said, he was trying not to babble more than usual

"Can you please tell me where were going?" Kensi asked

"It's a surprise Fern" Deeks said, he knew it she didn't like it but he was nervous and he wanted to lighten the mood.

"Okay Marty" Kensi said, the way Kensi said his name made Deeks weak at the knees. He never knew his name could sound so good.

"I like it when you call me Marty"

"I do too" Kensi said, at work he could be Deeks, but when it was them, he could be Marty.

"I hate it when you call me Fern" Kensi said smiling

"I don't, I think it's cute" Deeks said

"How the hell did you come up with Fern, I will never know?"

"Improvising" Deeks said

"If you say so" Kensi said. they were both starting to relax, she wondered why she was so nervous. It wasn't like Deeks was going to hurt her.

"Here we are" Deeks said pulling into a parking lot

"I knew we were going to the beach, were not surfing are we?" Kensi said whishing she hadn't spent so much time getting ready.

"You wish princess, give me a little credit. That the second date"

Kensi didn't say anything, she was taking in the beauty of the resturnant on the beach in the sun set. Before she could open her door, Deeks was already doing it.

"My lady" Deeks said as he opened the door and held out his arm.

"Wow, thanks Deeks, I mean Marty. Sorry, old habits die hard"

"I don't mind either way" Deeks said

They walked over to the restaurant Kensi perched on Deeks arm.

"Good evening, name please" The matredee said

"Marty Deeks for 2"

"Right this way Mr. Deeks" he said motioning them to follow

"Marty Deeks, I'm impressed" Kensi said

"Only the best for my princess" Deeks said kissing the hand he was holding.

"Here you are, your waiter will be right with you. Enjoy your night"

"Thank you" They both said

"Here you go Kensi" Deeks said pulling her chair out for her.

"Thank you Marty"

"I forgot something in the car princess, I will be right back.

"Deeks" Kensi said, instantly feeling like he was going to bail on her.

"Kens, I will be back. I promise you" Deeks said giving her a kiss on her cheek.

Not less than 2 minutes later Deeks came back in.

"I'm back princess, like I promised. I want to give you these" Deeks said flashing her his winning smile and then he handed her the flowers.

"Deeks, there beautiful, I love them. Thank you!" Kensi said getting up and giving him a hug and a kiss.

"Anything for you" Deeks said kissing her back.

They ordered their food, some wine and dessert.

"Deeks, the food was amazing, thank you so much"

"It was really good, even though I ended up sharing my steak" Deeks said pouting

"I like share with you" Kensi said taking his hand in hers.

They were both much more relaxed and comfortable than when they.

"Here is your check" the waiter said as he laid the paper down.

"Thanks" Deeks said

"Deeks, let me pay half" Kensi said

"WHAT!. Hell no" Deeks said, baffled that she would even suggest such a thing.

"Marty, please. This place has to be expensive" Kensi said

Kensi knew that most decent guys would pay for dinner and dates and things, but Jack always made her pay at least half if not more.

"I can afford it, Kens if I couldn't afford it, I wouldn't have brought you here. And if for some astronomical reason that my bank account suddenly depleted I will charge it to Hetty" Deeks said trying to lighten the mood, and curious as to way she would want to pay.

"Deeks are you sure?" Kensi asked

"Kens, let me treat you how you should be treated, you can buy coffee tomorrow. Why would you want to pay?" Deeks asked

"Jack always made me pay half or all of it" Kensi said

"I'm sorry he was an ass and that he didn't treat you right. You should be treated like a princess, and that's how I'm going to treat you" Deeks said smiling.

Deeks ended up paying the whole check, which was a new thing for Kensi.

"So are you ready for another romantic surprise" Deeks asked as they walked out of the restaurant. Deeks took Kensi's hand in hers.

"Thanks Deeks, I had a great time" Kensi said

"Nights still young" Deeks said

"Where are we going?" Kensi asked

"The beach" Deeks said

"I should have known" Kensi said laughing.

"Did you bring your gun with you?" Deeks asked, getting a nervous look on his face.

"No? Why would I?" Kensi asked, getting worried.

"Because, I kinda told Nell that I was taking you out on a date" Deeks said looking sheepishly

"Deeks, why I thought we were telling them together"

"I know I swore her to secrecy"

"And that worked out so well, when you were 'fired'" Kensi said

"Kens, you scared the shit out of her" Deeks said

"I needed her help, I need her to set up the beach for me. Please Kens, don't be mad. The guys wouldn't intimidate her to say anything" Deeks said, hoping he didn't blow his chances.

"Fine, as long as she doesn't tell anyone" Kensi said

"She won't Kens" Deeks said taking her hand back

Deeks and Kensi walked down the steps onto the beach.

"It's amazing how many more stars there are in the sky on the beach then there are in town. It's beautiful"

"Just like you" Deeks said, blushing as he did so. Kensi didn't say anything but he could tell she was blushing as well.

"Over here Kens" Deeks said leading the way.

What Kensi say was breath taking. There was a blanket laid out, surrounded by the battery operated candles and some binoculars. Kensi thought it was the most romantic thing anyone has ever done for her.

"Deeks, was this your idea or Nells? Kensi asked

"Mine, mostly, Nell just put the candles in a heart shape" Deeks said

"You blew me away, I'm shocked. I love it, thank you" Kensi said, gesturing for him to sit next to her.

"I'm glad you like it" Deeks said sitting behind her instead of next to her.

"Kensi immediately lay back against him, she was regretting not bringing a jacket.

"Are you cold?" Deeks asked. Kensi just shook her head yes. The gentleman that Deeks is took off his sport coat and put it on Kensi. She then leaned back against him.

"Thanks Deeks" Kensi said. She loved having his jacket on. She has worn Sam, Callen's and Deeks' jacket before but that was because missions never seemed to go the way they planned. Deeks jacket made her feel safe. Then he put his arms around her to make her warm.

"Better?" He asked

"Much" They then snuggled into each other and gazed up at the stars. It was a beautiful night, not a lot of clouds. Kensi could not have asked for a better first date.

So everyone, how was it? Please review. The first date is not over yet. I was wondering if you want me to continue after the first date, there are different ways I can do this. Let me know what you all think by reviewing and private messaging me! Thanks!


	3. Chapter 3

Hi everyone, I'm so sorry I have not updated sooner. I had a few family members that were gravely ill and my grandmother passed away. I myself also became sick. So between keeping up with school and getting back into my normal routine and sports, I did not have time to wright.

"_You blew me away, I'm shocked. I love it, thank you" Kensi said, gesturing for him to sit next to her. _

"_I'm glad you like it" Deeks said sitting behind her instead of next to her._

"_Kensi immediately lay back against him, she was regretting not bringing a jacket. _

"_Are you cold?" Deeks asked. Kensi just shook her head yes. The gentleman that Deeks is took off his sport coat and put it on Kensi. She then leaned back against him. _

"_Thanks Deeks" Kensi said. She loved having his jacket on. She has worn Sam, Callen's and Deeks' jacket before but that was because missions never seemed to go the way they planned. Deeks jacket made her feel safe. Then he put his arms around her to make her warm. _

"_Better?" He asked _

"_Much" They then snuggled into each other and gazed up at the stars. It was a beautiful night, not a lot of clouds. Kensi could not have asked for a better first date. _

Kensi and Deeks laid on the blanket and looked at the stars forever, it was not until Deeks checked his phone and realized that it was after midnight did he come out of his trance of cuddling with Kensi. Kensi herself wasn't asleep, but she wasn't fully awake either.

"Her Kens, babe, wake up" Deeks soothed in her ear.

"What, what time is it" Kensi asked groggily?

"After midnight, we better get home so we can at least draw our guns tomorrow so Callen doesn't flip" Deeks said.

"Yea of course" Kensi said.

Deeks got up first and then helped Kensi up.

"Did you have a nice night?" Deeks asked

"I did, I had an amazing dinner with an amazing guy" Kensi said

Deeks was actually speechless. Deeks leaned in to Kensi and Kensi leaned into Deeks, they kissed and Deeks dipped Kensi until she was almost level with the sand.

"Deeks" Kensi said. Deeks didn't want her to ruin the moment so he kissed her again to shut up her up.

After a few seconds, they broke their kiss and cleaned up the blanket and candles. Deeks of course carried everything with his left hand, and had his right arm wrapped around Kensi who was still clad in his jacket.

They drove in mostly silence back to Kensi's, they didn't need to talk and they both were tired. When they arrived at Kensi's she had to put her shoes back on, but before she could Deeks opened her door, grabbed her, her shoes and her flowers and carried her to the door so she wouldn't scrape her feet.

Deeks put her down at the door mat of her little cottage.

"Deeks come in and stay the night" Kensi said. She knew that he was tired and they had to go to work. She was pretty sure he kept an emergency

"No Kens, that's not what respectable gentleman do after the first date" Deeks said

"Deeks, we've stayed at each other's houses before, what's the difference?"

"Kens, were both tired, I don't want to take things too far; that either of us would regret" Deeks said

"Can you come in for a few seconds so we can talk" Kensi asked.

"Ok, just for a little" Deeks said

They walk in and Kensi wraps herself in a big blanket and they sit on her sofa.

"So you can stay the night without anything happening, we've done that before. Just because you or any guy stays over doesn't mean that anything has to happen" Kensi said

"Kens, we both had a ton of walls up against everyone and most importantly eachother. It took us awhile to break them down, I don't want to mess that up and you think that you can't trust me or vice versa" Deeks said giving her a foot massage not only trying to take the pain away from her heels, but also because her feet felt like ice.

"I understand where you're coming from, I don't want to screw anything up, but I'm just saying we can sleep in the same bed without or the same house without things going to far. I'm not ready and I don't think that you are either. But just so you know you, Callen, Sam, and Renko have all stayed here and I've stayed at everyone's house other than Sam's."

"Kens, I know. Please let's not push it, we had a great night and I don't want to mess anything up. I'm gonna go. want me to pick you up for work tomorrow?"

"I understand, no I will just drive myself"

Kensi walked Deeks to the door and they kissed again which was reassuring to Deeks because he figured he pissed Kensi off.

"Kensi will you go out on a second date with me?" Deeks asked

"Of course" Kensi said giving him a kiss on the cheek

"Goodnight" Deeks said kissing her back

"Night" Kensi said shutting the door.

Kensi was worried about their date, she didn't want to mess anything up and she understood why Deeks didn't want to stay; and she respected him for them.

Kensi went to bed a happy woman, yet she still wasn't sure why she had reserves about their second date. Kensi never went on a second date other than her second date that was with Jack, the date when he became abusive.

**So how did everyone like it, please review, review, and more reviews!**


	4. Chapter 4

Hey everyone so I'm back. After the hurricane last October life become crazier than I ever could have imagined so I had to take a break from writing. I will try and update as fast as I can. Read, Review and enjoy!

Also, I have made most if not all of the Jack stuff up.

Kensi was lying in bed replying her date with Deeks over and over again. She had a great time, she wished Deeks had stayed, but was glad that he respected her so much. She wanted go on a second date with him, but there was a feeling in her gut that told her second dates are harmful. Kensi drifted into sleep thinking about telling the others tomorrow.

Meanwhile, Deeks was also lying in his bed wishing that he could be cuddling Kensi. He was confident he made the right choice, but that did not mean that he wanted to leave. He knew Kensi was complicated and that in order to not scare her off, he needed to be gentle and understanding. Out of the whole team, he probably knew the most about Jack other than Nate because he pyres and Hetty because she knows everything. Deeks knew that Jack really messed her up and that Kensi blamed herself and Deeks swore that if he ever met this guy he would kick his ass all the way back to cave men times. Deeks was so happy that he could barely contain himself; he could not wait to tell the others that they had gone on their first date. They all knew that he had confessed his love for Kensi the day she was hormonal and the day her dad had been found killed but he hoped that it wasn't just because she needed someone to love her. This was Deeks' biggest problem her over thought everything and expected the worst. Bad things had happened to him his whole life, he tried not to be cynical but sometimes his mind just wondered. Deeks thought so much that he ended up putting himself to sleep.

The next morning Kensi woke up and went on her usual morning run, she was surprised Deeks hadn't texted her but it was a nice day and she figured he wanted to surf before work. As much as she teased him she really did like surfing with him when they were undercover. After her run Kensi went back to her house and got ready for work, she really just wanted to tell everyone about her and Deeks and have a girl's night with Nell.

Kensi texted Nell and to ask her about tonight.

Kensi to Nell: (Hey Nell, take out, ice cream and chick flicks tonight?)

Nell to Kensi: (Of course, do I get the details from yours and lover boys date?)

Kensi to Nell: (I guess since you knew about it. That's exactly why I want you to come over tonight. I will see you in work).

Kensi finished getting ready and texted Deeks.

Kensi to Deeks (I had so much fun last night. Can we get lunch today I want to talk? See you in work, also we should tell everyone together.)

After she sent it Kensi was worried that Deeks would get worried about her wanting to talk. She just felt the need to tell him more about Jack and her whole second date policy.

Deeks to Kensi: (Ok princess, is this date number 2?)

Kensi to Deeks: (That's what I want to talk about).

Deeks to Kensi: (Is everything ok? Did I upset you?) Deeks was now worried that there would never be a second or third date.

Kensi to Deeks: (Yea everything is fine, just some more walls I need to let you into)

Deeks to Kensi: (Ok, as long as you're ok, see you in work).

A little while later Deeks and Kensi both arrived at work. They all said their good morning hellos and Deeks asked Hetty, Nell and Eric to come down.

"Everyone, Kensi and I have something to announce" Deeks said

"If she's pregnant I'm going to kick your ass" Sam said going into protective big brother mode.

"Ha no worries about that at the moment" Kensi responded.

"Mr. Deeks, will you and Ms. Blye please tell us your information, we do have work to do" Hetty said, already knowing what they were going to announce.

"Well, Kensi and I went on our first date last night, and we decided to make it official" Deeks said with the biggest smile on his face.

"Yea its true, we both decided to take it slow and do everything properly. We've both been hurt and we don't want any of this coming between our friendship or partnership. We want to do something the conventional way for once." Kensi said leaning into Deeks.

"Nell thank you for not telling anyone and thank you for helping me" Deeks said.

"Anytime and congratulations" Nell said going over to hug both Deeks and Kensi.

Callen went over to Kensi and gave her a hug.

"Deeks, Mine and Sam's offer still stands that if you hurt her we will hurt you. And congratulations man" Callen said shaking Deeks hand.

"I think my partner said it all, Congratulations" Sam said shaking Deeks' had and hugging Kensi.

"Finally" Eric said "Do you know how many ops I had to watch that were filled with the sexual tension between you. I'm glad you both have come to your senses" Callen said hugging Kensi and shaking Deeks' hand.

"Well Mr. Deeks and Ms. Blye, I see that you both have come to your senses and realized that you belong together. Now I am not sure I will be able to keep you partners, I have to talk to the director about that. But as it stands you will remain partners as long as you r relationship does not interfere with your work. Congratulations to the both of you" Hetty said with a smile.

After all the congratulations, everyone went back to work. It was a slow day so they just worked on paper work. Soon it was lunch time.

"Kens wanna go get lunch?" Deeks asked

"Yea sure. Back to the deli?" Kensi said

"Yea as long as you're not going to pass out again" Deeks said remembering that the last time she got lunch there was one of the best and worst days of his life.

So I'm going to end it here. Please read and review and remember if you have any suggestions to let me know!


	5. Chapter 5

So recap from last chapter. Deeks and Kensi decide they are going to go out to lunch to discuss their new relationship and their fears concerning their relationship. There is a few lines from the early episodes of season 5.

"So what are you going to have?" Kensi asked Deeks as they walked into the deli to order lunch.

"I think a buffalo chicken sandwhich, what about you?" Deeks asked

"A chicken Cesar wrap"

"We could always split them so we get both" Deeks said taking out his wallet.

"Hmm, maybe" Kensi said playfully.

"No you're not paying again you payed last night. If you pay every time we go out to eat you will be broke in a week" Kensi said

"I know but it's new, let me pay for now and then when we become more of an old married couple I will let you pay. I'm just trying to be a nice guy Kens, you know do the right thing. So let me pay and then we can work something out" Deeks said

"OK fine, but you have to understand that I haven't depended on anyone since i was 15 years old" Kensi said.

"I understand. Do you think you can handle ordering yourself or do you want me to order for you and ask for a coloring book and crayons" Deeks said knowing this would entice an eye roll.

"Hmm, I think you're the one that needs the coloring book shaggy". Kensi said

"Just order" Deeks said knowing he has gone even longer with out shaving.

Deeks and Kensi ordered and went and sat down.

"So Kens" Deeks started, knowing he face was becoming flushed.

"Deeks, you promised we would take it slow" Kensi said instantly not knowing that to do.

"Kensi we will take things as slow as you want, but if we don't talk were noting even start anything to take it slow" Deeks said.

"I know, where do we start" Kensi said, looking at him for the first time since they sat down.

"We have to talk and be honest" Deeks said

"Talk about what?" Kensi said wondering if there whole thing is a bad idea.

"Kensi, for once just tell me what is going on in your pretty little head" Deeks said.

"I don't know how" Kensi said.

"Kensi, come on. Let's just talk. Let's just try" Deeks said.

"I think I'm ready" Kensi said.

"Ready for what?" Deeks just wants her to admit their thing to him.

"Our thing" Kensi mumbled.

"What I'm sorry I didn't hear you, can you go find a microphone?" Deeks said.

"Kensi just say it again"

"Our thing, I want to talk about it, and I am not good at talking about it"

"Ok so let's start" Deeks said.

"I hate you." Kensi said hoping to change the subject.

"You don't. You don't. You don't hate me." Deeks said ginning from ear to ear.

"Deeks" Kensi said.

"Kensi, I promise I will wait for ever for you. You don't have to worry about that. I will wait as long as you need me to" Deeks said learning across the table to kiss her.

"Deeks to fast" Kensi said.

"Ok, so we go slower, let's talk" Deeks said.

After awhile of just sitting there Deeks was tried of waiting for Kensi to start talking so he figured he would.

"Kens, you know I can't stop talking for long periods of time" Deeks said smiling.

"Kensi was about to say something when Deeks stopped her. "Let me talk first"

Kensi just nodded her head and Deeks took it as his cue to continue.

"Kens, I've probably told you this before but the first time I saw you I fell in love. I always thought love at first sight was a load of crap, but with you it was real. Every time I've gotten in some sort of trouble since coming to NCIS, I always thing of you. I think of you to get me through it. I get it, we both have pasts that we don't want to ever relive. I mean I shot my dad after years of abuse. We have masked our thing for basically 5 years. I'm tired of living alone, I'm tired of going to the beach with just Monty, I'm tired of not having someone to wake up to in the morning. I'm tired of not being with you" Deeks said finally saying the things he has wanted to so badly for years.

"Deeks, I, I don't know what to say. I've been on my own for so long that I don't know how to be with someone else, to do things with someone else and have to understand someone else. When Jack left me, I figured I would just be alone for the rest of my life. I knew unless I changed jobs, no adoption agency would ever give me a kid. I kind of decided before I even met you that I would be alone the rest of my life; you, you changed that. You showed me that no matter how much bad and evil there is in the world, that there are still good people, with good hearts out there. You helped me find me again, you showed me that there are other alternatives to being a loner, and it scares me. It scares me that one person can bring up feelings and emotions that I have shoved in a closet for almost ten years. And now that these feelings are back, I never want to let them go, I'm just scared" Kensi said, not even realizing what she was saying, just talking from the heart.

They both sat there for a few minuets thinking about what they both said. Neither one of them wanted to say the wrong thing.

"Kensi, everything you said, did you mean it?" Deeks said breaking the silence once again.

"Yea I did, what I feel for you, I have never felt before in my life. When you were tortured, leaving you was the hardest thing that I ever had to do. I didn't know what was gonna happen after Granger and I left. I was scared that you were not going to make it. When you wouldn't look at me in the hospital, it broke my heart. I didn't want to leave you, Granger basically had to pull me away. When you didn't answer the 50 calls and text messages I wasn't as concerned about losing a partner as much as losing my best friend, and the man that I love"

"Like I said, you were the only reason that I am still alive. I've been close to death several times, that was the closest I ever hope to come, because at times I really didn't think I was going to make it. You, your smile, you one liners that I always feign hurt at, all of it is what kept me alive. With out you we would not be having this conversation. You were the only one to get me to sleep, when you sat next to me it wasn't the boring movie you were talking about. I t was the fact that the person I trust the most, my best friend, the woman that I love was sitting next to me and didn't hate me for ignoring her" Deeks said.

"I'm glad I was that reason" Kensi said smiling.

"I'm glad you were too. I think that we both have been close to dying to many times to ignore this. Kensi I am all in if you are. The whole thing, dating, engaging, wedding, babying and living" Deeks said, proud of himself that he was able to end all of the words the same way.

"Engaging, wedding and babying are taking things a little to fast. But Marty Deeks, I would love to have you shaggy, neanderthal babies one day"

"That's all I needed to hear Kens" Deeks said laughing.

"Where do we go from here?" Kensi said.

"Well Kensi, will you go out on a second first date. I know you have second dates and have a thing about them, but if we keep saying its the first date, there is nothing to worry about" Deeks said.

"Of course I will go on a second first date with you" Kensi said

"Now if I kiss you really slow, can I kiss you?" Deeks said with a sheapish grin.

Kensi didn't respond and instead kissed him so hard that he thought he would never breath again.

Well there is chapter 5 everyone. Hope you all enjoy it. Don't forget to review.

I will also incorporate parts of season 5 into my stories. I am not going to ship Kensi off, she is going to stay in LA.


	6. Chapter 6

Deeks and Kensi head back to work after their lunch fairly confident with their discussion. They walk back in silence, but closer than they normally do.

"So no second first date tonight, do you just want to come over and we can talk more. There are some things I feel like I should divoulge to you before we go on our second first date" Deeks said breaking their silence.

"I was going to have a girls night with Nell, but I can see if I can change it. I think it would be good for us to talk more. I liked how our conversation went today. I also think you should know more about me. You know more than the rest of the team, maybe with the exception of Hetty, but not because I told her anything. Some days I feel like she has been tailing us for years" Kensi said with a laugh.

"I really wouldn't put anything past her. Now I feel bad for making you cancel on Nell. Should I tell Eric to finally ask her out?" Deeks said with his usual smirk.

"Actually that might not be a bad idea. I know for a fact that they are more than just nerd buddies. Nell has never told me outright that she likes Eric but different things she has said and the way she says them has us written all over it" Kensi said

"Well then I pity them, because we are still trying to figure everything out" Deeks said laughing.

"Well, maybe they communicate better and don't try to say things with out actually saying them" Kensi said

"Touche" Deeks said.

"Now I don't know what to say. So what are the chances that we can finish some nice little paper work and head out early?" Kensi said hopefully.

"I'm guessing slim to none, usually when ever we have plans things never go according to them" Deeks said.

Kensi and Deeks rach the mission. They were not back more than 10 minuets before they had a case.

Eric briefed them, a subject that they had been tracking for weeks was finally starting to leave a trail. They had to go to some remote wharehouse and recover stolen military technology, specifically blue prints and maps for a new USMC base. If these prints got out, with their secret passages, and codes it could jeopardize thousands of bases throughout the country and abroad.

They went to the armory and get their Colt M4A1's vests, and extra amo and their normal guns. They knew that this would be a big fire fight and they had to be prepared.

"So you ready for this?" Deeks asked

"Yea, Deeks we have to treat it the same. We have to act like we would have acted yesterday. No second guessing, go with your first instinct. Don't look at me like your girlfriend, look at me like your partner. We trust each other, and we have each others backs. We also have to prove to Hetty and Callen that we can date and still be partners, because I don't want another partner" Kensi said

"I know, I know we can't treat it any different. It's just, forget it" Deeks said looking away not wanting to show Kensi that he was more concerned for this op than he really should be.

"Deeks, remember we both promised to try to talk to work things out better. You not telling me things isn't going to help" Kensi said wondering what really was going on.

"I'm just...concerned about the possibilities. Like what if someone takes you hostage or something like that or vice versa" Deeks asked hoping Kensi wouldn't laugh.

"Well if that does happen, which I hope it won't, we will deal with it like we always do. You have a shot take it, you don't have a shot you don't take it. Try not to over think things, do what Callen always says, trust your training. And we are both very well trained" Kensi said hoping this would alleviate some of Deeks' fear.

"Trust our training" Deeks said loading all of their gear into Kensi's SRX.

"Ok lets go" Kensi said while getting in the car. Deeks followed suit.

They drive to the warehouse and when they pull up Callen comes over the earwig and tells Kensi and Deeks to take the back and him and Sam would take the Front.

"Ready?" Kensi said getting out of the Car.

"As I will ever be" Deeks said getting their gear out. They strapped on their vests, and holstered their weapons. They went over to the back door and waited for Callen's cue.

"On my count. 1, 2, 3" Callen said over the earwig.

The four of them went in Deeks and Sam shot open the doors and Callen and Kensi went in first shouting Federal Agents. Callen and Sam took out a few guys and continued to look for the blueprints. Deeks took out two guys when he heard a struggle. He tried to hide and find Kensi at the same time.

"Deeks" Kensi yelled. Callen and Sam could hear things had not gone properly so they went to find Kensi and Deeks.

Deeks had eyes on Kensi and her captor, some where along the way she lost her Colt M4A1 and the way he held her neck, she really could only engage in hand to hand combat. Deeks had a shot but he froze, he didn't take the shot he knew he should have.

"Deeks take the shot" Kensi pleaded looking directly at him.

Deeks just look directly at Kensi and her captor.

"Dammit Deeks take the shot" Kensi yelled a second time. All Deeks could think of was where the hell was Callen and Sam. Deeks was afraid that if he took the shot it wold hit Kensi.

"Drop your weapon and let her go. You don't really want to kill a federal agent" Deeks yelled knowing he had to do something since he wasn't going to take the shot. The federal agent part spooked Kensi's captor and she was able to to start fighting the guy.

She took a few punches to the face and ribs and when she was on the ground he kicked her in the ribs. The whole time Deeks just stood there, sure he trusted his training, but he couldn't put the fact that this was his girlfriend out of his mind. Kensi was down and bleeding. She can hold her own but this guy was bigger than Sam and definitely over powered her. Seeing the blood snapped Deeks out of his trance and he finally shot the guy. Deeks cleared the gun and Callen and Sam came running in. Deeks thought the whole ordeal had taken hours, but it was really only seconds.

"Deeks what happened" Callen asked as Sam called for two ambulances even though Deeks had killed Kensi's captor.

"He had Kensi, I didn't have a shot, there was a struggle between Kensi and the guy and then I shot him" Deeks said running over to Kens. Before Callen could say anything Deeks was frantically checking Kensi's injuries.

"Kens, talk to me. What hurts?" Deeks asked scanning her from head to toe.

Kensi just pushed Deeks away from her. She was more hurt that he Couldn't put aside his feelings for her to take the shot that he clearly had so instead she looked to Callen and Sam. Deeks was visibly hurt that she wanted nothing to do with him at the moment. he knew he screwed up, but he also knew that this was uncharted territory for both of them, and they were bound to mess up along the way. Deeks walked away hoping she wouldn't stay mad at him for too long.

"I will ua go find the blueprints, you guys take care of Kens" Deeks said clearing his throat and going to find the blueprints.

"Kens talk to us" Callen said running over to Kensi.

"Face, jaw, ribs, ankle" Kensi said trying to get up.

"OK hang on, the ambulance will be here soon" Sam said

Eric came over the earwigs "Guys hows Kensi?"

"She will be OK, looks like a few broken ribs, sprained ankle and a bruised jaw" Callen said.

"OK, keep me updated. Did you find the blueprint?" Eric asked hoping the answer was yes.

"Deeks went to look for them" Sam said. Eric thought it was funny that Deeks wouldn't be with Kensi. He had only heard some of what happened because with the fight, the gunfire and shaky connection he couldn't make out all of the words.

Deeks came on the earwig next and said that he had found the blueprints along with some missing weapons that they thought was part of a different case. More paperwork, but less searching he thought to himself.

The ambulance came and whisked Kensi off to the hospital. All Deeks wanted to do was go see Kensi and try to explain himself. Sam, Callen and Deeks all went to the hospital.

Deeks drove Kensi's SRX and Callen and Sam were in the Challenger. Hetty met them at the hospital and Deeks gave her the blueprints.

"Hetty, here take the blueprints. I will do the paperwork tomorrow. I just want to make sure Kensi is ok" Deeks said. Hetty knew something was off but she couldn't quite place it.

Deeks went to Kensi's room bracing himself for the worst.

"Hey Kens, how ya feeling? What did the doctor say?" Deeks said walking into Kensi's room.

"Get out" Kensi said not quite yelling but it was very firm.

"Kens, please I'm sorry" Deeks said hoping she would forgive him.

"Deeks, I said get out. You are the last person I want to see" Kensi said.

"Feel better" Deeks said as he walked dejectedly walked out of her room to the others.

Once Deeks saw the others, he instantly regreted not finding an alternative exit. Deeks knew he and Kensi had to show Hetty and Callen they could work together and Deeks figured that would not be an issue now. Callen knew how much Deeks was hurting so he didn't push the matter. That was a discussion for a day when their nerves were not frayed.

"Deeks whats wrong? Is she ok?" Callen asked.

"Yea I mean I think so. I don't know she told me to get out. So Callen can you drive her and her car home, and Sam can you pick Callen up? I am just going to walk home" Deeks said walking towards the exit of the emergency room.

"Deeks, wait what happened?" Callen asked

"Like I said, she doesn't want me here. Just promise me one of you will take care of her" Deeks said. He just sprinted out of the hospital. He just wanted to go clear his head. He wasn't too far from the beach or his house but he decided to go to the beach. He ditched his hoodie because it still had blood on it and he didn't need people staring at him. All he wanted to do was comfort Kensi and take care of her and talk to her, but he let her down so badly that he wasn't sure they could over come this. Deeks went to the beach and just sat in the sand for what seemed like forever. He had left the hospital at about 3:00 pm. The op overall didn't take long.

Back at the hospital Callen went into Kensi's room. He could tell that she had shed some tears, but didn't press matters since he knew she was not in the best of places at the moment.

"Kens what did the doctor say?" Callen asked gently.

"Two broken ribs, sprained ankle and a dislocated jaw that they put back into place" Kensi said wincing.

"Sorry Kens, sounds painful. Can you go home or do you have to stay" Callen asked.

"I can go home. They brought the pain medicine to me and I signed the papers I just have to wait for the doctor to come back with the crutches" Kensi said.

"OK I will drive you home and spend the night so your not alone on that ankle" Callen said.

"Thanks, but I will just take the ride. I just want to be alone" Kensi said as the doctor came in.

"Alright Agent Blye, you are free to go. Do you have a ride" the doctor asked.

"Yes, Agent Callen is going to take me home" Kensi said, now wishing it was Deeks. She wasn't up for a girls night, and honestly she just wanted to talk things over with Deeks.

"Very well, feel better Agent Blye. If you do not see an improvement with in a week, please come back"

"Will do, thank you" Kensi said

"Have a good day" the doctor replied walking out.

"OK Kens, ready to go? And are you sure you don't want me or Sam to stay?" Callen asked, knowing she shouldn't be alone.

"Yes I am sure" Kensi said getting up slowly. Callen handed her the crutches and helped her up.

"I can get Nell to stay" Callen said.

"No Callen, I don't want anyone to stay. I just want to be alone tonight. I am going to go home and go to bed" Kensi said knowing she probably wouldn't sleep tonight.

They walked out to the car. Hetty had gone back to ops so it was just Callen, Sam and a hobbiling Kensi.

"OK Kens, Callen will drive you back and then if you are sure you don't want him to stay I will take him home" Sam said.

"Thanks you" Kensi said getting into her car. Once she was settled she sent a quick text to Nell to tell her she was ok, and that she would have to take a rain check on their girls night.

Kensi was lost in her thoughts, now hating herself for pushing Deeks away. She was just as confused and scared as he was and she was doing what she does best. OK she can't do what she does best at the moment which is run, but her second best is pushing people away; and she was excelling at that. Kensi was so lost in thought that she didn't even realize she was home until Callen kept saying her name. Sam was already at her door and Callen had gotten out of the car.

Callen and Sam helped her into her house.

"Kens do you need anything?" Callen asked.

"No you guys can go, I'm gonna go take a shower" Kensi said

"Kens let us stay in-case you fall or anything" Sam said going into big brother mode.

"Fine" Kensi said.

Sam and Callen talked amongst themselves and they went to look for food so Kensi could take the pain pills. She only had bread and peanut butter. So they made her a peanut butter sandwich and got her a drink and placed it on the table.

"Feel better after your shower?" Callen asked as Kensi came out.

Callen and Same gave each other knowing looks at the fact that Kensi was wearing one of Deeks' long-sleeve surfing shirts and a pair of his mesh gym shorts. She could deny it all she wanted but they both knew that she wished Deeks was here with her instead of him and Sam.

"Yea much, I'm glad to get the blood and hospital scent off of me" Kensi said sitting down on the couch next to Sam.

"We made you a sandwich and brought you the pain pills. Promise us you will take them" Sam said knowing that she was like him and had to be forced.

"I will thank you" Kensi said eating her sandwich and taking the medicine.

"So your sure you want us to go?" Callen asked still a little concerned that she would be alone.

"Yea I am sure, please" Kensi said putting her feet up of the sofa. Same propped her ankle up on some pillows and brought her some ice for her ankle and ribs.

Same placed a blanket on her and Callen handed her the TV remote.

"Call us if you need anything Kens, please" Callen said.

"I will I promise, thanks guys. I will talk to you in the morning" Kensi said.

"Bye Kens" They both said.

As soon as they were out of the house Callen and Sam talked about the fact that she was wearing Deeks' clothes, she couldn't have hated him too much.

When Callen and Sam got into the car, Callen called Deeks several times, figuring that he would want to know about Kensi.

Deeks was sitting on beach when his phone kept ringing. He saw Callens name and figured he was going to yell at him for not taking the shot. After he called three times Deeks decided to answer in thinking that maybe something happned. He still cared about Kensi, hell he loved her but she was pissed when she kicked him out.

Deeks finally answered

D: Yea Deeks

C: Hey Deeks, Kensi is fine and at home. She has a sprained ankle, dislocated jaw and two broken ribs"

D: I'm glad it's not to serious, her ribs and jaw will take longer to heal than the ankle. So is this where you ream my ass out for not taking the shot.

C: No, today is not the day for that. You two need to figure out if you can work together now.

D: I'm going to say no, since she wouldn't talk to me, she pushed me out of the way at the warehouse, and she kicked me out of her hospital room.

C: Deeks, I get what your saying, but after her shower she put your clothes. She can't hate you too much if she was wearing your clothes.

D: I don't know. She always said they were comfy so who knows.

Deeks still wasn't sure how they were going to work this one out.

C: Deeks, I know I'm not one to give relationship advice; but I think she needs you tonight. She kicked Sam and me out too. At least try and call her.

D: Yea maybe

Deeks just hung up. He didn't want to continue the conversation and he didn't know if he should go over or not. It was now 5:50. He hadn't realized that time it was but he was realized he was starving so he got up and walked home.

So everyone, I hope you enjoyed it! I wasn't planning on making this chapter this long but then when I was writing I didn't want to just end it. So will Deeks go to Kensi's or will he just go home? That's the big question. Please review!


	7. Chapter 7

Deeks walked back to his house contemplating whether or not he should go to Kensi's. She seemed really mad at him but if what Callen was telling him was true then she couldn't be too mad. Deeks decided that he would go to Kensi's. The worst she could do would be to shoot him; but he felt like he had been shot through the heart so he didn't think it would be that bad. He fed Monty and took him outside for a little. Then Deeks went to the store and got some of their favorite Landshark beer, ice for her injuries, some dessert items he knew Kensi loved, pudding in case she couldn't eat and stuff to make smoothies and milkshakes. He also stopped at their favorite Chinese restaurant and got his kung pow chicken and her chicken teriyaki. He wasn't sure how much she would be able to eat but he figured it was the thought that counted. The whole time Deeks was driving around LA gathering his desired item he was still unsure if he should go to Kensi's. Yes, they had decided at lunch that they needed to talk more things over. Deeks was ready to open up to Kensi, to relive some of his child hood that he had kept hidden for so long. He also needed to tell her and she couldn't punch him in the face anymore. That was going to be a big discussion. He thought that he could finally tell Kesni the truth about the last thirty four years of his life, but after today he wasn't so sure. He knew that there would be more times when he would mess up, it's bound to happen; but she can't push him away every time he does something that she doesn't like. Their partnership, their friendship and their relationship could never withstand it. Deeks didn't care so much about the partnership and the relationship as much as he did the friendship. They had both promised each other that they wouldn't let it come between them as friends because they were each other's best friends and they didn't want to lose that. Deeks hadn't even realized that he was at Kensi's and had been sitting there for about 10 minutes. He got out of his car, grabbed the food and grocery story items and his overnight bag and figured it's now or never. He wasn't sure that Kensi would be able to get the door, but he also didn't want to use his key for fear that Callen was wrong and she didn't really want him there.

Deeks walked up to the door and rang the bell. He waited a few minutes and then was about to walk away when the door opened.

"Hey Kens" Deeks said softly.

Kensi didn't answer, but she also didn't slam the door in his face so he figured it was a good start.

"Kens, can I come in? I brought food and beer" Deeks said hoping this would help.

Kensi didn't say anything but she hobbled far enough away from the door so that Deeks would be able to get into the house.

"Kens listen, I'm sorry. I should have taken the damn shot, I shouldn't have froze" Deeks said walking in and placing his bags of goods on the ground.

"Yesterday you would have taken the shot, today you would have taken the shot if it was Callen or Sam" Kensi said.

"But it's not yesterday and your not Callen or Sam" Deeks said trying to help her over to the couch.

"Touche" Kensi said with a small smile.

"Kens, I really am sorry. I knew I had the shot but I panicked, it was no longer just my partner standing there; it was my girlfriend, the woman that I love, the women that I can't bear to lose. Suddenly you weren't NCIS Special Agent Kensi Blye, you were just Kensi Blye my girlfriend" Deeks said looking down at his feet.

Deeks had gotten Kensi back to the couch and he propped her ankle up on the pillows before going to get the food.

"I know, I over reacted. I should have never punched you and kicked you out of the hospital. I'm sorry, it's just I've spent my whole career trying to be one of the guys, not some damsel in distress. When I was partnered with Dom, he was a good agent, but young and nieve. I had to be the one on the lookout all the time, the one that took charge. When you came, that changed. You were very capable, you just didn't believe in yourself. You are very good at detecting" Kensi said with a laugh knowing he loved shoving that in their faces.

"Well for one thing, I'm glad your not one of the guys" Deeks said sitting down on the other end of the couch.

They both just sat their for a few minutes thinking over the day and how much had happened.

"Kens, we do need to talk about this and if you don't want me here I will leave. Callen called me and said you were wearing my clothes so you probably weren't too mad at me. But, you hurt me Kens, I promised myself that I would never let anyone I trust punch me in the face and just take it. My dad loved punching me in the face, and today when you did it, it...it took all my willpower not to punch you back. Being punched in the face brings back memories that no child should ever have to go through. So if this is going to work were going to need to talk about. I know you don't like the whole talking about it part and you don't know how to deal with your emotions; I get it Kens, and we will work though it together but it will take some time. We can't just shut each other out every time one of us screws up because it's not healthy"

"Deeks, I really am sorry about punching you, I didn't know it would bother you that much. I was mad that you wouldn't take the shot. Who knows if you had the shot or not, but we can't second guess ourselves in the field or one of us is going to end up of Rose's table" Kensi said.

"I know, so let's eat and then we talk" Deeks said getting the food out of the bag.

"I brought you real food, but we could always put it in a blender and you can drink it" Deeks said with a laugh.

"Yea I tried eating a peanut butter sandwich that Sam and Callen made me, but i just took small bites and spit it out when they left. Still hurts to much to chew"

Deeks got up so he could fully look at his injuries. He gently turned her head so he could get a better look at the damage to her jaw.

"It's starting to bruise but lucky for you i bought very long tube socks that we can tie around your head to keep the ice on" Deeks said with a small laugh but then leaned down to gently kiss the bruise.

"I will not be drinking my chicken and I will not tie tube socks around my head" Kensi said with a laugh.

"Well then your in luck because I brought stuff for milkshakes" Deeks said getting up to go make it.

"No sit, eat your food before it gets cold. I can deal with a beer for the time being" Kensi said.

Deeks handed her two beers, one to drink and one for her face. He got himself one and they sat there while he ate.

"So Kens, tell me what the doctor said. How long are you out for?" Deeks asked

"Well he's not sure. He said I will probably need physical therapy for the ankle, and that it will take a few weeks for the ribs to heal and about a week for the jaw" Kensi said wincing in pain as she moved.

"Broken ribs are the absolute worst. I could always kiss them and make the better?" Deeks said with a smirk.

"Maybe later, eat faster, I want my milkshake" Kensi said with a laugh.

"OK Kensalina" Deeks said finishing his last bite.

He made both of them chocolate milkshakes and went back to sit down.

"Thanks Deeks, this is amazing" Kensi said after a few sips.

"I know you normally like them thicker but I tried to thin it down to make it easier to eat" Deeks said.

"Thank you" Kensi said blushing at how much he could still care after she had been so mean to him.

"I perfected making them after the whole Sidorov thing. Solid foods were not an option the first few days" Deeks said.

"Deeks, I really am sorry" Kensi said wanting to just discuss everything they needed to so they could watch TV.

"Sorry about what?" Deeks asked not really wanting to talk even though he knew they needed to.

"Deeks, seriously?" Kensi asked.

"Sorry continue" Deeks said.

"I should never have punched you, I was totally out of line. Like I said I just wanted to be one of the guys. I have come to realize that is damn near impossible but I still try for some reason. I know I should not have gotten made at you for not taking the shot, it was stupid and I apologize. It's going to take time for us to balance out thing and partnership, but I'm in if your in. If were going to do this were going it together" Kensi said taking another sip of her milkshake.

"Yea, I'm in. I want to make it work. I can't imagine spending the rest of my life with someone else, or having a different partner. We just have to let time take over to figure things out. But we always work it out no matter what, and we will work it out" Deeks said.

"But" Deeks continued "Kens, the punch hurt more emotionally that it did physically. Like I said, that's where my dad use to hit me and my mom. Years ago when I put the sad, fragile seven year with a broken jaw away I promised myself no one would ever hit me like that again. My dad continued to hit me so I kept working out. Believe it or not I was a three season athlete. In the fall I played soccer, in the winter I swam and played basketball and in the spring I played baseball. As the years went on and puberty hit I got taller and stronger and I was finally able to over power my dad. The first time I remember that I was able to get him to stop hurting my mom was when I was 14 in 8th grade. Luckily mother nature was on my side and I grew early and fast so I just lifted weights every day to make sure I was stronger than him. And I always told myself I could never be hit or abused that why by someone I trusted. And the feelings I had towards you today scared the shit out of me Kens, I had to keep telling myself that you were my partner and that you can't express emotions like a normal human in order for me not you pummel you. It broke back anger that I have been harboring for years. I feel terrible for admitting this but I think you need to to what it does to me. I can take the playful punches in the shoulder and the jabs to the abs because they are like steel, but the face that crosses the line" Deeks said, hoping she wouldn't be mad.

"Deeks, I had no idea. I really am sorry. I'm trying to do better with my emotions but it's not working. If I ever try to hit you again you have permission to hit me" Kensi said feeling very guilty.

"No Kens, you don't get it. I don't want to hit you, I don't want you to feel guilty. I just want you to try and talk thinks through or take it to the punching bag. If you really want to hit my face we can put a picture of it on the punching bag but I don't want to hit you because then I would be no better than my own father" Deeks said looking away from Kensi.

"Why don't I just stop the hitting and take it to the bag or the sparring mat" Kensi said now fully understanding what her partner meant.

"I think that's a better idea. I really do like the sparring mat, because it's ok to get a little handsy on there" Deeks said flashing his usual grin.

"In your dreams lover boy" Kensi said.

"So are we good over today. You can't hesitate and I can't hit and shut" Kensi said hoping that they could work through this minor setback.

"Yea were good" Deeks said learning over to kiss her.

They finish their milkshakes and Deeks is the first to break the silence.

"Kens I'm scared" Deeks said hoping bringing this up would be ok.

"Mmm 'bout what" Kensi said hoping everything was ok.

"You, us, me turning into my father" Deeks said looking away from Kensi.

"Hey Deeks look at me, your doing it again. Your not saying what you mean" Kensi said slightly confused.

"What I mean is if we do continue to date which I hope we do, I'm scared I'm going to turn into my father"

"Deeks, from the little bit of information that you have told me, I don't think you have to worry about that. Deeks your proably the kindest person I know. Your horoscope was right, your loyal and dependable and from what you told me nothing like your father. And remember I will kick your ass if you ever try any of that on me" Kensi said hoping she was saying the right things.

"I just never want to be him. I spend all my time trying not to be him, but what it I actually am him"

"Deeks where is this coming from?"

"You said we need to be honest with each other and this is me being honest"

"Deeks I don't think your anything like him. Your kind, caring, gentle and loving. I mean look at Monty, if it wasn't for you he probably would have been dead" Kensi said laughing at the scruffy mutt they both loved so much.

"Max Gentry is him and I'm Max Gentry" Deeks said

"Your not, he's an alias. I'm not really Fern, and Melissa or any of those other characters that Hetty forces upon us. Deeks the fact that you get up every morning, go surfing and come to work should show you that your not your father. You have said it yourself you break hearts and save lives, although I think you should be done with the heart breaking." Kensi said.

"I guess, it's just I've been trying to put my past behind me but I can't seem to shake it lately"

"Maybe that's a good thing. Your past has shaped you into the man that you are, my partner. The guy I love" Kensi said.

"Excuse me what" Deeks chocked on his beer.

"I um, what I ua meant to say was I, I got nothing" Kensi said turning a nice shade of red.

"It's ok Kens, I love you too" Deeks said turning equally as red.

"See Deeks your not your father, you have the ability to love someone and I'm glad that someone is me" Kensi said.

"I am too"

"Did I help a little?" Kensi said hoping the answer was yes.

"Yea you did. The feelings I had earlier scared me and their feelings that my dad had and I was scared I was becoming him"

"Well, I am very sorry for bringing those feelings up. I'm not perfect either" Kensi said.

Deeks motioned for her ankle are he started to massage it to make it feel better.

Well everyone there is chapter 7. I will hopefully post chapter 8 soon. Don't forget to review!


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